The aim must always be to strike with the whole body, every part soft and loosely connected.
This is the essence of 'reeling silk' and is cultivated by whole-body strength.
Performed correctly, this should ensure 'soft meeting' upon impact.
Whole-body strength and reeling silk will not prevent adverse feedback on impact unless you are soft, sensitive, and have awareness.
This is not so hard to achieve. It just takes a little practice. In time it will be second nature.
Study Newton's 3rd Law of Motion.